This is incredible to me please take time to hear the testimony of a broken man that God got a hold of!!!

I have set out my heart to NEVER settle for less!! The Lord has unlocked this reality to me a couple years back and ever since it has revolutionized my life tremendously!

As I was sitting there in the pew pondering if "this" is what it was all about. I would hear one thing (the Love of God, the Power of God, the Healing of God) but experience another. I was so confused when I would read Pauls letter to the Ephesians in Eph 3:17. I wasn't seeing it experienced nor was I experiencing it myself. This set me out on a venture to find out if this mystery was even real to be found. I started by practically asking God questions that my human brain could make some kind of sense of. I started with the question, "Does the Bible exaggerate?" I thought maybe they spoke differently back then. I asked that simple question and God took it and grew that tiny seed into a growing tree! As I was sitting there thinking I might as well just sit back on the pew then God answered, "You're right Jessica "this" is not ALL it! No, the word is true! I do desire for you to receive ALL of it ...ALL of Me!!! I praised Him in my heart as he was answering my questions! Such a sense of joy and relief started rushing in! He gave me an illustration of what it was like. It was as though he gave us a fish tank and we explored this new treasure. It gave us great excitement yet eventually after turning over all the rocks and being awed at the beautiful creation and life it was teeming with. As time went by we started getting tired of seeing the same things so we attempted to explore it a couple more times and upon disappointment we just settled with the thought, "this is it!" So, of course with that hole in our hearts that God has placed in each of us (that is reserved for Him) we tried to fill it with other things. That day changed my life! God said, "My child I desire to give you much more then a fish tank I desire to give you my ...Ocean!!!!!!!

And ever since, my dear friends I have been so blessed to get a glimpse of  Heaven of His healing power in my own life and the life of others! As the the broken man I mentioned earlier (on top of the page of this post) has been able to see more of the LOVE of God it too has revolutionized his life, the mending of his shattered family, relationship with his wife, and healing relationships with his fellow brothers and sisters in Christ!!! When  I see these things it makes me once again fall more in love with the Character of my Heavenly Father! As it was well said on the very end of the message my heart leaps and says, "Yes and Amen!" God sent his son so that He can have His Divinity poured into our humanity!! This world is so broken! We see pain where ever we turn and God doesn't ever want us to settle for less and just say "this is it." He desires to heal all of our infirmities ..broken hearts,relationships,families,sicknesses etc (you can fill in the blank).



"That Christ may dwell in your hearts by faith; that ye, being rooted and grounded in love,

May be able to comprehend with all saints what is the breadth, and length, and depth, and height;   And to know the love of Christ, which passeth knowledge, that ye might be filled with all the fulness of God.  Now unto him that is able to do exceeding abundantly above all that we ask or think, according to the power that worketh in us." -  Eph 3:17-20

Jealous for the Testimony of the Lord by Denny Kenaston

Well... Here I am this still morning with a lil' time on my hands to post before work.

I was just pondering my amazment toward God and the way he leads me! I am greatful to be here (in MO) at a place that I can be surrounded by sweet friends and family who love me, have a job, live next to family, have a room mate that has been a beacon of light in my life!! I have all my needs met! Jehova Jireh truely is my provider!!!!! And if God should guide me else where I will rejoice too!!! Because wherever I go He says, "I will be with you ALWAYS!" Even through the fire! He has taught my heart to rejoice on the mountains and in the valleys!!!! If I didn't have valleys I wouldn't be here to declare His faithfulness and know His saving grace! I wouldn't have experienced His strong hand that has dug me out of the pit and hewn me out of the stone (grave of hopelessness) Isaiah 51 and has also pulled me out of the fire!

Ok, I really wanted to post more but this will have to do for now! Later, I will update on what has been transpiring in my life these past days! Gotta get to work! :)

Love ya all!



  

Show me that I have climbed to Thee by the path of pain.

"My God, I have never thanked thee for my thorn. I have thanked Thee a thousand times for my roses, but not once for my thorn. I have been looking forward to a world where I shall get compensation for my cross; but I have never thought my cross as itself a present glory.
Teach me the glory of my cross; teach me the value of my thorn. Show me that I have climbed to thee by the path of pain. Show me that my tears have made my rainbows." George Matheson

Therefore I take pleasure in infirmities, in reproaches, in necessities, in persecutions, in distresses for Christ's sake: for when I am weak then I am strong! 2 Corinthians 12:10

Can I say once more ...God is GOOD!

God has been amazingly good to me! I am so thankful that he is my Father! I have seen dross in my life and it has caused me to be afraid to run to him (feeling too unworthy) so I would try to get fixed by running to others but God (as a loving father) keeps calling me to himself.  I saw that no one has the key to my lock or the cure to my disease, they would say, "Go to the great physician, he knows!" the Lord would even bring testimony after testimony my way how someone would be in need and go directly to Him (The creator of all things, author and finisher of faith, perfect councilor, God of all comfort) then he would directly answer their prayer! He is sooo good to me, so patient, so longsuffering, see 1Corinthians 13 and that can give more of an idea of who he is! ...He is LOVE!  Therefore, I will say, "Yes Lord, here I am! Fix me and make me become more ino your image ...Love!

My sheep hear my voice.

This picture describes something I feel the Lord has been showing me lately.

 

It's sad but soooo true! The scripture comes to mind, "In quietness and confidence shall be your strength. You shall hear a word in your ear saying which way to go, walk in it." (paraphrased)

The amazing thing about God is that he desires to give us the desires of our heart and the devil would want us to think, "Oh, he's so hard on us!" So we want instant relief by drowning out life (and Him in the process) by giving into our pleasures (instant relief) instead of letting him perfect his patience in us. Daniel, Joseph, and King David, Moses, Abraham and so many more that went before us all let patience perfect her perfect work in their lives! Now generations can hear those stories and have hope and give God the glory but if they tried to give themselves instant satisfaction then those stories would never be birthed and God wouldn't get the glory and people wouldn't have the hope! Not to mention, they also wouldn't have developed the sweet love trust relationship with their Heavenly Father as they did! God is GOOD in ALL His ways!!!!

For the Joy that was set before him he endured the cross!

Traveling day's!

As of June 11, here is a brief diagram of my travels...

HONDURAS                  
MI
NY
PA
NY
MI
NY
PA
MI
FL
MI
MO
AR
MO
MI
VA
MO
MI
VA
MI
MO
AZ
MI
FL
HONDURAS
FL
AL
MO

9 TIME ZONE CHANGES
6 AIRLINE TICKETS
28 PLACES
EXPERIENCE? ..PRICELESS!

WOW!!!

But now, I'm ready to settle and see what God has for me here. His love is never changing!

Beauty for Ashes

Hello to all ..again!

Wow, a lot has transpired since last I posted. Well, I'm here in Missouri now with some time on my hands before work. Just wanted you all to know I'm still alive ..and kicking! :) This morning has been sweet! I've had time to reflect on my Lords amazing redeeming love He has toward me and it's caused me to fall more in love with him (again). I've described God with these beautiful lofty adjectives and adverbs before in my old journals when there was not a trial in sight but now since I've been through fire, storms, and pain I truly mean every word I choose. Through the years I've had many trials come my way and God in His sweetness has allowed it to bring me all the more closer and deeper in love with Him. He has also given me a message, the same message Christ desired to bring while he was on earth ..HOPE to the hopeless!

I say this to help you understand the amazingness of God and His redeeming love! As I have recently undergone again some rocky roads, God has in His faithfulness brought hope to me! I said, "It hurts, it hurts!" then He, through the aching pain, whispered "I am a redeeming God! ..I can turn your ashes in for beauty!" I never knew the feeling of pain, failure, shame, a bleeding broken heart until now! I use to hear people talk about it and they would choose to even take their own life because of it but it has never been a true reality to me until recently. Instead of giving into hopelessness I ran to Him! "Come to me all who labor and are heavy laden and I will give you rest." Upon taking the invitation, He so tenderly has been bandaging my wounds and drawing me closer to His heart that so longs for me. He has held me so close to Himself through every storm! He has given yet another reason to live, another reason to wake up in the morning and actually get out of bed ..with HOPE! As the tears were flowing and I said, "It hurts too bad!" He gave me a ray of sunshine that brought such peace, such joy, such hope! He showed me that he has created (and still is creating) my hurt to become another ones comfort! ..Ashes for beauty! Now, I have a different perspective! Though the tears may still seep through, at times, my hurts now have the power to remind me of many of my hurting fellowman and of this broken marred up world. I have come to realize that pain is very real. Our scars, hurts, and unpatched deep wounds from the past causes us to hurt, react, and try to live with it on our own. Then he brings to my mind what He has said and even now still says. The first message Jesus chose to speak in the synagogue was taken from Isaiah in chapter 61.

"The spirit of the Lord God is upon me; because the Lord hath anointed me to preach good tidings unto the meek (humble); he has sent me to bind up the BROKENHEARTED, to proclaim LIBERTY to the captives, and the OPENING of the prison to them that are bound; to proclaim the acceptable year of the Lord, and the day of vengeance of our God; to COMFORT all that mourn; 2 To appoint unto them that mourn in Zion, to give unto them BEAUTY for ASHES, the oil of JOY for mourning, the garment of PRAISE for the spirit of heaviness; that they might be called trees of RIGHTEOUSNESS, the planting of the lord, that he might be GLORIFIED!

This is why I love him ..because he has first loved me! King David said, "His rod and staff are truly a comfort to me." I can say the same thing! I am in myself absolutely NOTHING! As trials have the ability to cause one to react, my own trials brought before me who I am with out the Lord my righteousness! He's been pulling out of me the parts that still reflect ME so that I can allow him to shine through and reflect HIM alone(The Lord my righteousness). Before God created the world there was nothing but darkness! In my self there is nothing but darkness! It's only His beaming light that can light up every dark room and every nook and cranny! Proverbs puts it like this, "But the path of the just is as the shining light, that shineth more and more unto the perfect day"!

Amen! let it be done in me Oh Lord!

love ~Jessica